I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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