Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
