Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
