LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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