She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
