I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
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