If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Randomize
