just come out here and I will go home with you...
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
