I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
