she woke up with a sticky ear
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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