this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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