I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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