i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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