I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
