Small penises have feelings too.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize