i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Bring me that man meat
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
