I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
