coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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