She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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