why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
