Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Too much gin, very little bucket
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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