Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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