Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
