Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I think pants incapable of making pants work
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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