I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
