Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
