Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
