Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
