it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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