I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Blow job season was short but glorious.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
