Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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