that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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