Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
