I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize