and you said cock pushups were impossible
He kissed a someone with a penis
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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