this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize