my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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