I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
