google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
