I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
