I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
