While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
you win again, gameday.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Randomize
