My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
