I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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