What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
My breasts were aching with rage.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
