She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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