I just threw up on my dentist
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
