there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
The best revenge is premature balding
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
