dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
