yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
