He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
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